Henry Charles Bukowski died, and then I was born.


And now, almost 19 years later I'm here, and with the fire of Charles Bukowski, the looks of James Dean and the heart of Mahatma Gandhi I'm gonna make love to a girl named Microsoft Word.









(Yes, I know. So annoying, right? Right? Mom, look at me! Look what I can do! Mom! Mooo-om! You're not looking!)

Call me your son; call me your brother; call me your friend, and make me terribly uncomfortable.

Let's go, but remember, always remember that I go by Nothing.








I have three guilty pleasures:
1. Alcohol
2. Crisps
3. J. Karjalainen

Just kidding. I'm not feeling guilty at all. Perhaps I will in the year 2018. Then I'll be lying in the gutter singing Väinö, Väinö, missä on se Väinö

A true gentlemen is one who is never unintentionally rude.

That's one cool name, dude

Hey

You are gay. I am straight. She is bisexual. He doens't have sexuality at all. My dog just generally speaking likes sex.

Almost there, James Dean, almost there, almost you







If I ever go bald, I will take everybody down with me and destroy the whole universe.

I just spent 30 minutes on the toilet with Charles Bukowski. I'm glad I'm not a hipster.

Morrissey is my 35 years older brother

...and nobody used the loo

Life is overwhelming.


I am weak, Oscar Blom.




I love too much.
I hate too much.
I wait too much.
I fear too much.
I know too much.
I know too little.


All these songs, all these memories, all these people, all these moments, all this future.

I love too much.

I don't have a butt

Me being sexy without a face

I don't need no man to get drunk. I'm a strong independent black woman.

Testicles II

Researchers found that the greatest unspoken rule of bus travel is that if other seats are available you shouldn't sit next to someone else. As the passengers claimed, "It makes you look weird." When all the rows are filled and more passengers are getting aboard the seated passengers initiate a performance to strategically avoid anyone sitting next to them.


I just accidentally found this article, and it is interesting because I use many of the tactics on the list:

• Pretend to be busy X
• Pretend to be checking your phone X
• Rummage through bag X
• Look past people X
• Do a 'don't bother me face' X
• Use the 'hate stare' X
• Avoid eye contact with other people X
• Lean against the window and stretch out your legs X
• Place a large bag on the empty seat X
• Sit on the aisle seat and turn on your iPod so you can pretend you can't hear people asking for the window seat.
• Place several items on the spare seat so it's not worth the passenger's time waiting for you to move them. X
• Look out the window with a blank stare to look crazy X
• Pretend to be asleep X
• Put your coat on the seat to make it appear already taken X
• If all else fails, lie and say the seat has been taken by someone else


Yeah. I really don't like sitting next to people. I don't like communicating with them either.

Testicles

I had a dream: I was sitting on a bus, when I suddenly realized that I was actually sitting on the lap of a 90-year-old man who was masturbating me in a strange way.

This probably doesn't say anything about me, does it?

Please don't leave me now.


I've got something to give.


Here. Take my hand.


And eat it.